Weekend of No Baby and Discipline

No, I haven’t had the baby yet. Stop asking. I mean, I try so hard to keep the baby in, and then I manage to hit term, and now I’m ready for the baby to come out. It begs the question, “Did I really need to be so careful about my activity? Did I really need the medication?” There’s really no way to know, and as always, better safe than sorry. I’m up and about now, but all the nesting is pretty much done so it’s just a waiting game. I will tell you this, Allison is getting antsy to get back to South Carolina, and I’d rather have her for longer after the baby is born.

This weekend was productive. Christopher hung blinds in my front room and kitchen, and probably said more curse words under his breath than I’ve heard from him in our entire 10 years of marriage. I can relate; I have hung blinds before, and I would have done them except it wasn’t wise for me to be, you know, using power tools while standing on a chair. They look great and I am much appreciative. We will eventually get reimbursed from our landlord, like with the whole house fan and ceiling fans, but we are in the process of taking care of a shower leak and slight mold problem in our bathroom, so the poor guy is getting stuck with a massive repair bill. We worked really hard to get the best deal possible, though. Mold remediation is not cheap. I’m glad the mold is gone now and I don’t have to worry about spores with the new baby. I’m still waiting for someone to repair the shower; luckily, we have two others.

Saturday was warm but cloudy, and we shooed the kids outside for most of the day. Megan and Gavin got Bryant and Dalton to be their partners in crime for the day. They played well for hours, and as it got closer to dinner we received a report that Gavin had thrown a rock at Dalton (Dalton threw one first, perhaps on accident). That was bad enough, but then he threatened to punch Megan if she tattled (Shay had already called, just to let me know), then rammed her with his bike. So he got a pretty harsh punishment. A spanking (later Christopher said he regretted and wouldn’t spank Gavin again), a grounding, and sent to his bedroom. The spanking and grounding didn’t phase him; he did cry when he got sent to his room. The boy doesn’t do well alone; he wants to be part of the action at all times, like all my kids.

Then, Sunday morning, Megan claimed Gavin threatened to punch her again if she didn’t play cars with him. Gavin vehemently denied it. We ended up having them both sit on the couch until the truth came out. This lasted an hour or two, then we went to church. They were both angels at church, and oddly enough, Ben was quite well-behaved, too. He even went to nursery for the first time ever without crying! It only took 14 months.

After church, we sent them to the couch again. Christopher and I suspected Gavin of the lie, but since Megan lies once in a while, too, we didn’t want to automatically believe her. In the end, though, we realized that Megan, out of conscious, would have cracked by now. Gavin, on the other hand, is the most stubborn person I’ve ever met. If he throws a temper tantrum, and you just ignore him, he will cry for hours. Instead, you address the need–feed him, put him to bed, etc. And in this case, he was sitting on the couch like he could sit there for days. We said we thought Megan was telling the truth, and of course, we were right. Gavin gets to do Megan’s chores in addition to the initial grounding.

He hasn’t had it bad today. Instead of computer time or play dates, he has spent most of his day playing Legos and painting at the kitchen table. Really not a huge punishment, although he has complained of boredom several times, and I have reminded him that grounding is supposed to be boring. The major thing he lost was a trip with Dad to see the Mariners tonight. Christopher is taking Megan instead. He didn’t seem too bummed, especially since Christopher had failed to tell him about it before his punishment. It was like, “Oh, by the way, I was going to take you to a ball game, but now I’m taking Megan because you threatened her twice and then lied about it.” I didn’t like the way that punishment went down, but like I said, Gavin cared more about the grounding/time out.

In the end, we’re just trying our best. Gavin is our sensitive, stubborn, intense child and he is going to require a lot of parenting. He will have to be loved extra and disciplined extra, and in a positive and constructive way. He also happens to be the kid I take the most sleeping pictures of, because then I can look at them and remind myself how sweet he really is. Raising him to be a good man is our challenge and privilege.

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4 thoughts on “Weekend of No Baby and Discipline

  1. Reminds me of the talk from General Conference about Parenting 505, I'm sure that's not what its called but that's what I think of it as. Gotta love it, they grow up so fast. His blonde eyelashes are beautiful by the way!

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